College advice is needed for literally everyone. College isn’t easy. I’m quite convinced most depression in adults from ages 18-25 is due to college and all the stresses that come with it. As a recent graduate I want to extend a helping hand. I’m creating a weekly series called “College Advice 1000” the last numbers change based on what number I’m at.
If you’re about to go to college, just so you know the classes are not anthropology or biology 101. Everything is in the 1000s. The numbers go from 1000-4000. 5000 and 6000 are graduate courses. Just a bit of background before we start… But here we go!
It’s ok to go to college with a partner. Long distance or otherwise. The chances of breaking up are pretty likely but that’s ok. If it ends, he or she wasn’t the one. And really, that’s ok. You pick up your pieces then make a new project with someone else and it’ll be great!
It’s also ok to end things before you leave. If you’re going to be hours apart and you have a fear of things ending badly due to the distance, then it’s ok to go solo. There’s plenty of people to choose from at school.
I went to school across the state, 5 hours driving, with a boyfriend who was one year younger so he was completing his senior year in high school. Everything was more or less fine for a while but it’s tough. If he had better communication skills, maybe we would’ve been better. We ended in April my freshman year. Almost the whole year! Luckily there was no foul play and we don’t hate each other. He was just a kid and I was doing a lot of growing up.
Having his support made me feel better all through the year. I went to school really far from family and most of my friends. I got BLESSED that one of my two beasties came with me. We didn’t room together because we didn’t want to screw up our friendship and thank The Lord because it would’ve. But during the first half of freshman year we didn’t see each other so much because she was tight with the honors kids and I was close with the international students. Truthfully as long as you and your Roomie get along you’ll always have someone. Anyway, having a boyfriend I had been with for awhile and that was home made me feel connected to home and comfortable. It also kept me grounded. I didn’t really go out and party. I likely wouldn’t have if I was single either but not going out much was a positive for me for awhile and I’ll credit it to him. My adjusting process wasn’t dramatic. I could always function and didn’t feel sad but one day it just became so clear that I didn’t need him like that anymore. And that’s ok. We both ended up right where we needed to be.